today some event made me think... is feelings important or izzit just something to make life a little more difficult....? yesterday we had a class party and a little quarrel occurred between esther and danica...basically esther wanna pack the food when everyone just started to eat...obviously its not appropriate to do so as the event only just started...so danica voiced out her opinion which most of us agreed to...but then there are also some that supports esther's actions..i meant if u wanna pack oso, pack la after awhile when its in the middle of the event or something la...
so today the 'battle' continues..and every1 is talking bout it in class...so i wrote something on the board which might have hurt someone's feelings...but i am just expressing wat i felt...thats wat i always do write on the board...boys in the class( including me...) we are also talking about it like we are a bunch of old women gossiping in the market... and i as usual will say my mind out loud without considering anyone's feelings...thats just me...so am i just so cold-blooded..or am i just trying to protect myself from getting hurt thats y i hurt ppl first...? frankly i don really know...i just feel that its fun to just be expressive instead of keeping things inside and hurt yourself...
back to the story...at the end of the day... esther apologize for her act yesterday...and i felt bad bcoz of the things i wrote on the board... then danica went and talk to esther just to sort things out and tell her wat she felt thats wrong with esther's action the other day... suddenly esther just broke down in tears...that really shocked me...bcoz all this while i always have the impression that esther doesn't care about wats revolving around her but herself...so in really open up my eyes..even if someone may seem like they are 'robot', no feelings...just work work and work... there are some small part of them that will feel hurt at times...
besides that...lately i really feel that school is such a hurtful place...every1 is trying to get on top by making ppl feel bad about themselves...or being close to some1 just to get something i return(suck-ups...) or even just by mere backstabbing..i don really get it y ppl wanna do that...do they get satisfaction from backstabbing...? or do they just feel that they are much more superior from others that they have to just tell ppl off in a rude way... i just don get it...especially with the young ppl in school (especially prefects..)...they just think that they are so good and almost perfect in everything...but ofcoz they think the world is just like that...unlike us...we have been working outside of school world...some of us even experienced other culture b4 so we know when to just shut up or when to talk crap ( although not always...ahahhaha) i just hope that they could just be a little more humble bcoz life's more than just school and friends from school...they might get themselves into trouble if they continue this...
lastly i would just wanna say...just be aware of your surroundings...ppl might be your friends in appearance but at heart u wouldn't know...i have experienced this and its really hurtful when u are so sincere but others are just making a fool out of u....its up to u to agree or disagree but just learn something from other ppl's experiences so that u wouldn't have to go through the suffer others had been through...thx for reading...chaoz...tc....
Friday, July 18, 2008
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